I know what you are going through, from miles apart I can feel that.
I know if I ask you about your past days, you won’t remember anything more than the corner of your room where you laid down all day in the dark. Somedays you get up and try to make things better but then again, the broken pieces of your soul align, and you go back to day one. It all feels like a loop to you, the loop that doesn’t seem to have an end.
The pain, the suffering, you can feel it physically at times when it gets too heavy. The negativity has rolled you on and the more the world asks you to be positive, to think better, to do better- You get tired of it. You want to confine in something, and you aren’t able to, because no one has the perfect words to make you feel better. And to be honest, even I don’t. Even I don’t have the perfect words that will make you fine.
People around you will tell you that give things time. Time heals the broken wounds, time will make you forget, time will let you forgive.
But you and me, we both know that it’s just getting bitter with time. You are just passing on days, don’t remember what you ate properly, or when did you bath and let the water in, or when did you go out and smiled since things went wrong with you.
But buddy when the time doesn’t heal things, You and me, together, have to.
So now the first thing you do when you get up in the morning, you draw the curtains of your darkroom and let the sun in, you freshen up. You let the water drop over that body and calm it to its extent. You go to the kitchen and make something healthy to eat with the taste too, I know you don’t want to, and you don’t even care but you do that.
Then you sit somewhere and thank God (I know you hate him right now for making you go through all this but still) about the single most thing you value and is still there and you say to him that “you know this all will pass on and you trust him that something good will come out of it”.
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Then you write or paint or dance or study or do anything productive that makes you feel better about this life. Go out and sit at some beautiful place, that makes even the dead feel alive. Breathe there, meditate. Shut on every social media page that connects you to the negativity that was drowning, watch some beautiful movie, or just observe people around, just try to be in the moment.
I know it’s not so easy. Your mind will still take you to what broke you. But trust me, we just have to take one step together each day. Just these important things we have to do each day. And I know on some days, you will think nothing is working and it’s still a loop. But you do it. You will still do it? Promise me?
Because I am telling you. Time won’t heal you. You will heal yourself. ♥️
Author- Simran Rastogi